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This month I want to continue with, and complete the subject of
relationships. But first of all I want to say something very important.
At this stage of your Inner Circle
training, I hope you are genuinely starting to realise how hopelessly
confused and powerless the average person is. They think they are in control of their lives, but in reality they have
absolutely no control whatsoever. They are pushed and shoved around by
everything and anyone. The insidious, frightening aspect of this is that
they do not realise they are being
controlled, used and manipulated. In fact, laughably, they actually believe
that they have power and choice in their lives!
If you ask most people, they will claim to be living in a free country.
They will have few complaints, if any, about the powerful regime which controls
every aspect of their working and private lives.
Once you start to use Inner Circle
teachings in your life, you will gain tremendous power and advantage over
others. I do not mean that you will want to rush out and exploit others. I mean
that you will have an advantage in the same way that a human has an advantage
over, say, a dog or cat. You will
naturally be more powerful than other people. And it is only the knowledge
of the various con-tricks and illusions which confers this great power.
Quite simply, as you rise through the grades of
Inner Circle, I expect you to stop
playing the silly little games which the rest of the population
are playing! Instead, I want you to start living a free, independent and
powerful life of your own. Not
dictated by someone else, not manufactured for you by media stereotypes, not a
silly illusion constructed by religion or other ludicrous mysticism, but your
own life, lived the way you want to
live it. The ultimate goal of your life is to be
whatever it is you want to be, unfettered by the constraints of society and
the sheep around you.
Now the important thing I wanted to say is this:
When reading through Inner Circle
power materials, it is easy to fall into the trap of thinking that the whole
thing sounds a bit depressing and negative.
Take relationships, for example. You might have received the impression
that the whole field of relationships is ruled by force, fear, control, illusion
and con-tricks and that all women are out to 'get' men, and vice-versa! I
mentioned this problem way, way back when you first started out on the path of
freedom. I wonder if you recall what I said at that point?
I said that the purpose of Inner
Circle philosophy is to explain the various con-tricks and illusions which
other people use to control and manipulate you. They want your life-values. They
want you to sacrifice yourself so that they might profit. But in order to
explain the various con-tricks to you, I have to dwell on these negative aspects
of human nature at the expense of the positive. I said that to criticise me for
this is rather like criticising a book on terminal infectious diseases as being
'unduly morbid', or 'obsessed with death'! I want to remind you that the whole
purpose of becoming an Inner Circle Initiate
is so that you can live a truly joyful, happy and fulfilled life.
There's nothing negative about that!
It is really exciting to be an initiate. Every day of your life is filled
with an incredible sense of well-being and happiness. This feeling arises
through having every aspect of your life
in firm control, going the way you
want it to go. Not just one
aspect, or a few aspects, but every
aspect of your life. You cannot be truly happy if even one part of your life is
out of balance or out of your control. It is irksome for me to receive letters
which say: “I agree with 80% of your marvellous philosophy.” I’m not on an
ego-trip. I don't want the world to agree with me 100%, that’s not the point.
I read such a letter exactly the same as I would read this: “I liked your
theory of electronics, and agree with voltage and resistance - but that current
stuff? I can’t agree with that. You expect me to believe that some sort of
current flows through a solid copper wire? Come off it Mr Goldsmith! Still, the
rest of your electronics course was great!”
I think you would agree that electronics is an integrated
theory and you cannot really pick the bits you like, and reject the rest. My
philosophy is also integrated. It should be accepted as a whole, and the extent
to which you reject it, is the extent to which you will be powerless. That’s
the stark truth, I’m afraid.
This is why I am spending time with you going through all the various
con-tricks and illusions, even if some of them don't apply directly to you. Only
by breaking free from the insidious control which others seek over you, can you
become truly free and empowered. And it is this feeling of power which brings
happiness.
If you are poor (no money), then you are powerless
in your personal finances. If
you are in a third class relationship, then you are powerless
in the field of romantic love, and so on. If you subscribe to mysticism
(religion, astrology, crystal healing, telepathy, aliens, etc., etc.) then you
are powerless in your rational mind.
How can you think rationally if you
are prepared to accept the irrational?
You cannot - at least not to the full extent of which you are capable.
Only by bringing every aspect of your life under control, your
control, can you gain power and hence freedom and happiness.
In the field of human 'romantic love' relationships, most people settle
for incredibly little. They accept third
or fourth rate relationships or worse. They use weapons against the partners
they claim to 'love'. They allow their partner to use weapons against them.
And they stagger on like this for years, sometimes decades.
Contrast this with the relationships enjoyed (and I use that word
deliberately) by the Inner Circle Initiate. He or she engages only in mutually supportive,
loving relationships in which there is an approximately equal exchange of value.
Each partner gains
pleasure by seeing that the other partner
is happy. In 'normal' relationships, the very last
thing people want is for their partner to be truly happy, because that means
they are free to go off and seek life-enhancing pleasures wherever they feel
like it - with other partners if the mood takes them.
No, most people in relationships are keen to ensure that their partner
stays within very tight, confined
boundaries of 'happiness'. In other words, they seek to 'enslave' their
partners and ensure that they stay put.
As a very general rule, 'normal' people engage in third or fourth rate,
game playing, joyless power struggles with their 'partners'. Initiates
engage in wonderful, exciting, life-enhancing, mutually beneficial
relationships. Each day in such a relationship
is a joy, a wonder. Until you have experienced this for yourself, you
cannot have the slightest idea about how superb such a relationship can be. And
once you have tasted the sheer joy of this type of relationship, you will never,
ever go back to the 'old' type of relationship. You
will wonder at how you could possibly have wasted so many years in such a
depressing situation. You will think that you can only have been mentally
ill to have put up with such a travesty for so long!
You would be right!
Finally, I will say again that there is such a thing as 'true romantic
love' leading to 'happy ever after marriage', but it is so rare as to be
almost non-existent. Certainly I have never met anyone or been told about
anyone who fits this description.
If you are in such a relationship, or far more likely, think
you are in such a relationship, then what I am saying will have little effect on
you. I'm pleased for you, and you should be delighted as you have found
something which countless millions of people spend their entire lives seeking
and never come close to finding. The rest of the mere mortals around you become
desperate and leap into ill-considered relationships with the first halfway
decent person to come along. They then spend years and years of their precious,
valuable, non-renewable lives trying to make a go of it with this third-rate
person. They then either pack it all in and run away (pathetic really, isn't
it?), or they throw in the towel and sit it out until they die, by forming some
sort of 'working compromise' with their 'loved one' .
Inner Circle Initiates meanwhile, are engaging in several different
incredibly exciting relationships, each of which will enhance his or her life in
a different way. When one relationship is dead, they move onto the next one.
It's that simple. They do not 'stick it
out' for years and years after the
thing has died. This would be extremely foolish behaviour. When you do this,
you damage yourself, and your partner. It is not in the life-plan of an Initiate
to go around damaging precious human beings, or to allow them to inflict such
damage on himself/herself.
Initiates usually have several different partners supplying their various
needs, although they might spend a few years exclusively with one partner. There
are no hard and fast rules. This is not a taking process only. The partner
must also be receiving roughly equal benefit, otherwise they would not stay.
Remember a relationship can/should only survive if each partner is receiving approximately
equal value through remaining in that relationship.
In conventional relationships, one partner is
often receiving far less benefit than the other, but they are manipulated into accepting this position by their partner who will use
one or more of the weapons.
Let us continue our look at how the weapons are used within relationships
by examining the weapon of: Sacrifice/Altruism
(Weapon #5)
Women (again) are particularly vulnerable to this weapon.
There is an unwritten law in relationships that it is somehow 'normal',
'natural' and 'right' for a woman to sacrifice her entire life to looking after
her husband and children. And I mean her entire
life. She is not allowed to have any further interests, desires and
ambitions. If she expresses such desires, then she is labelled as a 'bad' mother
or wife.
As I have already stated, most men would ideally want a woman who
sacrificed her entire life towards making him happy. Most men hate
the thought that their wives or partners have any interests of any
description outside of the marriage. At best, they 'allow' their wives to
have a couple of silly little hobbies like
sewing, or cake-decorating! Just as long as these hobbies don't interfere with
her main duties to look after and support her man!
Ouch! Some home-truths there, guys.
Of course, many men 'allow' their wives far more freedom than this, but
they still hate doing it, and would rather their wives remained at home,
cooking, cleaning, sewing and sorting out sexy underwear for the night’s fun
‘n’ games!
I would like, at this point to outline the difference between the normal
sheep-sheep 'marriage', and the initiate's open and honest relationships: Married
Sheep
The sheep marry (cohabit, etc.) because they claim to 'love' their
partners!
Then, as soon as they marry, they set about the long and careful task of restricting their partner's attempts to enhance their own life values.
They strive to put a firm lid on their partner's thoughts of self-improvement,
self-expression and growth. The very last
thing they want is for their partner to grow, to explore new horizons, or to
seek fulfilment. They view this as threatening to the relationship.
Why?
Because this so-called 'loving' relationship is nothing more than an
attempt to con the partner into sacrificing their entire life, for as little
reward as possible!
And yet these sheep claim to be 'in love'! They claim to 'care' about
each other! It’s a kind of sick joke, really.
The sad truth is, that within a very few years of being married, most
women have their husband's feet nailed firmly to the floor. He will be
allowed some freedom, but not too
much. He will be called upon to sacrifice his entire life-energies to his wife
and children; and woe-betide him if he steps out of line, looks at another
woman, or wants too much time to himself or his hobbies. Certainly
if he tried some crazy stunt like improving his life, or enhancing his pleasure,
she would come crashing down hard on him until he stopped his silly nonsense!
And yet this woman would claim to 'love' her husband! If questioned, she
would probably even say that she cared for him!
Again, within a very short time of being married (cohabiting, etc.) most
men have their wives 'bagged and tagged'. This is an easier task for men,
because women have been conditioned for centuries to expect precious little from
life. Also, when children come along, women become instantly powerless. It is
almost impossible for a woman to get up and leave if she has children. Men know
this, and often ruthlessly exploit the fact.
The very last thing a man wants
(he positively shudders at the mention of it) is for his wife to go out into the
world and seek happiness and fulfilment!
Given half a chance, most men would take steps to ensure that their wives never
met another member of the male species again!
He takes a very dubious view of any attempts on her part to educate or
improve herself. It would seriously worry him if she started an Open University
course, or similar - he would find this threatening in the extreme. He would far
rather place a firm ceiling on her
aspirations. The ceiling height should be the same, or preferably lower than the
height it was when he first met her.
Yet this man would claim to love his wife! If closely questioned, he
would also claim to care about her, and to have her best interests at heart!
And here's the important point:
What do these two sheep offer each other in return for completely
arresting each other's mental,
emotional, sexual and intellectual development?
They offer a dull, stale, tired, mindlessly boring, but secure routine!
Sounds like a great exchange!
This is a common theme amongst normal people. They will sacrifice almost
anything for security. They crave
security, they long for it, they lust after it. Nothing pleases them better than
to have every day exactly like the previous day, and to know that tomorrow will
be the same as today.
They become really scared at
the prospect of change (= growth), and they will go to extraordinary lengths to
ensure that there is no change (except cosmetic) to their lives. It has truly
been said that most people do not live for seventy years, but live one year
seventy times.
In contrast, the initiate seeks growth, desires growth, adores change and
is continually on the lookout for new, exciting life-experiences. He shuns
security (apart from the more obvious kind) and considers a nice, safe, snug and
secure environment to be the closest thing to death this side of the grave. Sex
I cannot complete this section without discussing that great taboo
subject (along with death and money) -
sex.
This is the end of the free preview
of this part of Freedom Factor. Excerpts taken from all the other chapters
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